When conflicts with management arise at work, it is very difficult to work. How to find a common language with the authorities? Let's talk.

It is impossible to have a dialogue with my boss, it is impossible to establish a good relationship. She makes me work harder than anyone, constantly raises her voice at me, sometimes she just yells and for this she pays me a penny! Are there any ways to counter this, or is changing jobs the only way out?

Igor, 29 years old, Tula.

There is a common phrase: "Every nation has the government it deserves." Relationships "Head-subordinate", as a rule, are bilateral and involve the activity of both parties. And if the boss is an "idiot", then the subordinate, presumably, is also "not a fountain." You can try to change yourself to change relationships. It is important to start with the fact that your opinion is subjective. The boss may not be a communication genius, but she's hardly an "idiot" either. You can have a scandalous character and not be able to communicate with subordinates, but be a brilliant organizer, for which she was put in a leadership position.

And an opinion like "She makes me work the most' is doubtful.

Perhaps you yourself are trying to work overtime to get noticed and appreciated. Or you're not doing a good enough job at the "perched" time.

"Raises his voice at me"- Let's talk about that. Have you noticed that it is simply impossible to raise your voice at someone, and everyone who is not lazy to shout at someone? Think: why? There are people who do not react when they are told calmly, and they try to “shout out” to them. There are those who do not respect themselves, and those around them feel it, dropping their tension on them.

It's not even about the boss, but about your sense of self. If you value and respect yourself, feel in your place, do your job well, do not violate corporate ethics- why shout at you?

Next claim - "Pay me a penny". But it was you who chose this job and for this money. If you evaluate yourself as a specialist with a higher qualification, go to another organization where you will receive the money that you consider worthy. Complaining about fate, looking for someone to blame on the side - there is no solution to this!

The blaming strategy, self-pity, living the “I am a victim” scenario - what is it for you?

Maybe you basically do not know how to be a subordinate? It happens that we unconsciously recognize our “strict” parents, “unfair” teachers, “cruel” coaches, etc. in bosses - people with whom traumatic stories from childhood are connected, and at the moment of meeting with the boss those pictures pop up. Hence the painful reaction to the person. In general, many unsuccessful people had a difficult relationship with their parents in childhood.

Before you change jobs, try to understand yourself, in your career goals. Here are some questions to help you.

1. Who am I? What am I? Where do I want to be in 5 years?
2. What are my goals? Which one is the closest? What will help me achieve it?
3. How does my job help me achieve my goals?
4. How do conflicts with superiors help me achieve my goals? Are they moving away from the nearest target, or are they zooming in?
5. What did I do (keep silent, not late, offer ideas, create projects, etc.) so that my conflicts with superiors are resolved constructively?
6. What will help me (knowledge, experience, etc.) to continue to transfer the conflict from an acute state into a constructive process?
7. When I achieve my immediate goal, how will I perceive my past conflicts with superiors?

How to find love?

I am 34 years old, married for a year, divorced. I went out without love: it seemed it was time. I'm looking for love, but nothing works. I can’t fall in love myself, and men’s interest in me quickly fades. It turns out some kind of stupid relationship, “one-time” or lasting for a long time, but with rare meetings and constant lies. Tired. What's stopping me from finding love?

Vika, Tula.

Someone from the wise said: "If you are unsuccessfully looking for love, then first find the barriers within yourself." The desire to love and be loved is a natural desire for everyone. Only for some reason, some successfully meet, meet, get married, while others never meet their lover.

The reasons can be very different, ranging from the model of relationships in the parental family and ending with mental trauma. But still, there are four attitudes that prevent you from falling in love happily.

1. "All men are consumers." A full-fledged relationship is an equal exchange: emotional (feelings, tenderness, care), intellectual and material (for example, a husband earns more, and a wife invests more in home comfort).

   If you get the feeling that you are only giving in a relationship, then what prevents you from taking? Perhaps the reason is not in the partner, but in you, in the inability to take. Maybe deep down you think that unworthy of love? Maybe you are “ashamed” to declare your desires and you dream that your partner will guess himself?

   But men almost never guess and don't bring you everything "on a silver platter" unless you directly say what you want from the relationship. Or maybe you subconsciously choose consumers, weeding out normal men, because for some other parameters you are attracted to just such, and you have to be a “mother” in a pair? Think!

2. “All the normal ones have already been taken apart.” Often women have a feeling of lack of men. In fact, there is more than one potential partner for every woman, it’s just that the social circle is often limited (and by the woman herself). As for the “normality” of a partner: identify five qualities that are important to you in a partner, and five qualities that you could turn a blind eye to. Develop your intuition and insight.
3. “To need another person is to be inferior.” A woman, in order not to depend on someone, pretends that she is strong, self-sufficient, tough and, in general, she does not need a man. And men love to be needed and such “self-sufficient” people are bypassed. Hard to break through armor much easier to be sincere, open woman who needs a man and wants to give love herself.
4. "I will be happy only when I meet my love." This is a limiting belief. After all, only one person is enough for happiness - you yourself! Another person is needed to share this happiness with him. That is, this belief works more effectively in the opposite order - when you yourself are happy, then the people around you are more willing and more active in your life. Be happy right now!

Give yourself joy, do not sit beech and do not wait for someone to come and make you happy!

Not getting along with your boss? You can’t understand what he wants from you, and are you tired of endless nit-picking? Try to resort to the advice of psychologist Susan Quillam. She managed to put everything in this life on the shelves - or rather, on daddies. In her opinion, the world resembles a desk, on which files with various materials are laid out - this is you and me and our thoughts. Using Dr. Quillum's theory, you can open these folders and read all the documents in them - that is, find out what is going on in the head of, say, your formidable boss.

Let's say you want to ask for a raise. The main thing now is to find out what arguments will be required to confirm the urgency of your request.

If the boss always and in everything relies only on his own judgment, you should not even ask for a salary increase - wait until he offers it himself. If he needs material evidence, he will have to list all his achievements over the past year (preferably backing them up with an indication of the material benefits that your actions brought to your native company). Be sure to list any new responsibilities you have had since your last promotion. Depending on what kind of sensory perception is more characteristic of the boss, state your claims orally, in writing, or even graphically. How to determine? Very simple. If you have ever heard the phrase from the boss: “I don’t need to tell you anything, make a better certificate,” it is clear that it would be wiser to resort to a written form of presentation. And if he has a craving to draw graphics in a notebook during meetings, you will have to do the same.

But the main thing that you have to find out is how receptive the boss is to your emotional state. More often than not, Susan Quillam points out, professionalism makes a much better impression than a call for sympathy. The one who wrings his hands and complains about being poor is unlikely to ever get a raise.

Even if you are not going to apply for a salary increase in the near future, do not waste time trying to find out what personality type your boss belongs to. This will come in handy for you anyway. Psychology, of course, is a complex science, and each such type is made up of many characteristics in a variety of combinations, but for a start, you can only learn the basics. In a working environment highest value has such personal quality as a motivation. What drives your boss? What helps him go from victory to victory? There are only three such "engines" by Susan Kuilliam: achievements, power, communication.

If the main thing for your boss is labor achievements, he expects visible results from his subordinates and is seriously worried about their absence. Do not torture a person, present him with as much visual evidence of fruitful work as possible. Remember: such a boss will never appreciate your modesty!

Other bosses are obsessed with power. They are constantly involved in intrigues, undercover fights, often like to humiliate their subordinates and demand from them proof of endless devotion and respect. In dealing with them, modesty just does not hurt. And also patience. The main thing is not to argue with such a boss, but for the sake of self-preservation, it is necessary to develop the ability to say a firm “no”. Do not give up and do not attack, stand your ground and never, never try to appeal to the best feelings of a power lover. Such a person is only able to enter the position of being on the same level with him on the social ladder, better - higher.

The rarest type of boss just loves to be around people, making as many acquaintances as possible and chatting, chatting, chatting. With these bosses it is convenient to discuss important topics at dinner, it is not a sin to gossip about colleagues. It is important not to cross the line that separates personal and official relations. Even more important is to remember the birthday of such a boss. Forget to congratulate - you will regret for a long time!

culture

The working day almost came to an end, all the employees were tired and relaxed a little. You are tired and relaxed. However, if you just gape at the water cooler, or run "bringing to life" solitaire on the computer as the boss suddenly enters the office. It's good if you and your boss have developed a normal relationship, and you can at least not twitch, trying to immediately remember all your blunders over the past few days.

If your boss is a dark horse for you, who only inspires you with horror and fear, then you are guaranteed a few unpleasant minutes and lost nerve cells. Is there any way to make your office life more peaceful? avoiding that nasty feeling of guilt (even if it's not your fault at all)? In fact, there are at least five ways you can keep your Olympian calm even when facing the biggest bosses.

1. You should look for a common language with your boss by studying him.

As soon as you got a job new job, or a new boss has come to you (or, even more so, both of you have been working at the company for a long time), do not be too lazy to make inquiries about your boss. For this, it is not necessary to hire a private detective.- you can use, for example, search engines social networks. After all, even psychologists say that students at school initially study not so much the subject as the teacher himself!

Once you know what kind of bird your boss is, who he is friends with, what his preferences and hobbies are, it will become much easier for you to communicate with this person. You will have a chance to learn to understand what can be expected from your manager at any given time, and you will certainly be able to successfully cope with panic attacks when meeting with the boss. However, try not to go to his page in Odnoklassniki from your real profile. And even more so, you should not post nasty things about your boss!

2. To connect with your boss, put yourself in their shoes.

So, let's imagine that you already know what kind of person you have to deal with, and you also know something about your boss's personal environment. Perhaps you have learned something about his weaknesses, punctures, shortcomings. Do not immediately treat all this as compromising evidence, and to your boss - as to an unfulfilled and overthrown idol. Remember - no matter how professional this person is, he is only a person, which means that he is characterized by mistakes and human weaknesses.

This approach will not only reduce the level of criticism with which subordinates usually relate to their superiors, but will also give you the opportunity to feel in the shoes of your leader. You will begin to realize that this is quite normal. that your boss may well not know the things that you or your colleagues know. This approach will be especially useful for those who have a need to accept a new boss, adjusting to it.

3. Find out exactly what your bosses expect from you

Stop making assumptions about what your manager expects from you. If it seems to you that the level of his claims exceeds the scope of your powers, it makes sense to try to get to the boss for an appointment (preferably not in the midst of the working day) to try and discuss your job responsibilities once again, outlining some boundaries. At the same time, one should try to soberly assess own possibilities not to take on too many promises and responsibilities.

Among other things, try to understand not only your duties in the workplace, but also try to find out the goals that your boss personally sees in front of you. Pay special attention to those priorities, which your superiors see for your activities in the company for the next period of time (a week, two, a month). It makes sense to make a list of the highest priority tasks, which will allow you to complete them on time.

4. Be open to change if you're looking to connect with your boss

It often happens that leaders come up with new ideas that, in your opinion, only interfere with effective work. However, it is no secret that employees often just don't want any changes, getting used to the known routine day and familiar directions. More often than not, a new boss is capable of "destroying" everything, who has a lot of new ideas on how to make everything and everyone work effectively.

The simple secret is that your positive attitude to the changes proposed by your boss will help you find a common language with the manager. If you categorically do not see anything good in the innovations offered by your boss, try to understand at least what he wants to achieve. Perhaps you really were at first glance unable to understand his aspirations. Offer your opinion on this issue. In general, do something, but just do not lock yourself into your own distrust and skepticism.

5. Don't wait for changes - propose them yourself!

Be proactive and forward-thinking. For example, if your manager constantly scolds you and your colleagues for unsatisfactory work, and you think his attitude is unjustified, go to meet the aspirations of the boss. Don't wait for your boss, pissed off by yet another bad month, to come up with ways to improve productivity. Instead, come forward yourself, so to speak, with a preventive proposal.

This method is suitable mainly for those employees who really know their duties perfectly and are able to bring more value in their workplace than they bring now. Don't be discouraged if your bosses don't like your ideas. First, this may not be the case; and secondly, the main thing is your sincere desire to do something truly useful, and not stupidly sit in the office for days and months on end.

There are situations when a person sincerely loves his job, but is completely tired of the constant reproaches of his boss. And it is difficult to get along with him, especially if the boss is a petty tyrant. If you constantly find fault with every little thing, sooner or later it will bring out any person, and then he will definitely not want to go to work in the morning. And in order to prevent another meeting with the offender, the only desire is not to leave the house, hiding in the far corner.

And there are only two ways. The simplest one is to change jobs, the more difficult one is to approach the issue wisely and try to improve relations with higher management.

general information

According to about half of the workers in our country, the bosses are petty tyrants. At least that's what opinion polls say. And the question of how to be in such a situation, whether it is necessary to observe subordination, excites many. Indeed, very often people like their work and salary, and sometimes there is simply no choice, because there are no other similar positions and conditions in the region. Removing the boss from the post is a dream of many, but unfortunately, it is almost impossible to realize it. In this regard, it is necessary to look for methods of how to get along with such bosses, and learn to tolerate his character.

Options

Many psychologists agree on this point in one thing: there are several options for how to get along with such a person. The first is to develop patience. A person should humbly, without taking it to heart, listen to all unreasonable and often humiliating nit-picking in his direction. Despite the fact that this option seems very strange and it can only be suitable for a very patient person, most workers in our country behave this way. And maybe everything would be fine, because observing subordination is the right thing to do. But from the point of view of psychology, such a development of events can significantly affect the health of the employee. Stress will accumulate, and psychological and physical health will decline.

In this regard, psychologists recommend not only to endure, but also to take care of your health. It is important to carry out psychological and emotional unloading. Do not relieve stress with alcohol. But if the employee does not have the strength to endure and humility is clearly not his forte, then it is better to find another way.

If the boss is constantly yelling, it means that he is not confident in himself and is afraid to seem ridiculous in the eyes of others. Therefore, it should be borne in mind that such people are very afraid of publicizing their incompetence. To figure out and understand exactly what complexes and injuries provoke him to defend himself from the world means to find a weapon that will work flawlessly on this person. There is even a chance that he himself will leave his post. But this method is very dangerous, because any mistake is slander, and it is punishable by law. But it is best not to resort to drastic measures and decide how to communicate with the boss without resentment and problems for both parties.

Choice of actions

Naturally, if every second an employee finds fault with his superiors on all sorts of trifles, the most easy way- Start looking for a new job. This method is ideal for people whose nature does not tend to fight for their rights, and those who are used to looking for easy solutions to problems.

According to the theory of probability, the tyrant boss will remain in the past, and the new leadership will be much more favorable. But if this is not the case, then it makes sense to build competent strategy actions. The first step is to understand what he screams about most often, and also to determine which of his nit-picks are valid and which are not. When conducting an analysis, one should not look at the question one-sidedly; there is a possibility that the manager is quite justifiably indignant at the poor-quality performance by the employee of his direct obligations.

hysterical boss

To build relationships with management, you first need to understand what type of personality his character belongs to. According to statistics, tantrums happen in 99% of situations in women. If they are in a state of permanent tension, it is very likely that they will take out their anger on subordinates, while maintaining affability with higher management and strangers. If this is hysteria, then it is worth acting like an armored train. Do not react. All answers should be controlled, without raising your voice and showing mutual emotions. If the nit-picking is ridiculous, it is worth arguing your opinion.

And in a situation where the authorities are trying to blame their subordinates for their own mistakes, it is best to clearly show him who is really guilty. You can also enlist the support of colleagues or management from above. In this situation, this should not be taken as betrayal or sneakiness, because the actions of a constantly humiliated employee will be fully justified.

How to find a common language

Unlike hysterics, the tyrant boss is aggressive towards everyone indiscriminately. Such people are undeniably confident in their own superiority over everyone else. They are mostly men who have advanced career ladder fast enough. Their main belief is that there are only idiots around, and communicating with them is worse than torture.

If a person has to communicate with a tyrant, then initially it is necessary to behave correctly. It is necessary to show that the subordinate has enough pride, and the option that he will become completely absent. Of course, the task seems difficult, but if it is completed, then there is a high probability that in the future you will no longer have to deal with nit-picking. In addition, a person must inspire himself with the idea that he is no worse than his tyrant boss. Psychologists also recommend using fantasy, for example, imagine the boss in a pink fluffy sweater or with a trash can on his head. This will allow consciousness not to take seriously its blows to self-esteem.

If the production manager constantly finds fault

Just a nagging leadership at first glance looks more harmless than a hysterical type or petty tyrants. But the fact is that constant remarks can bring out even the most calm and balanced person. Nagging bosses will carefully control every step of their subordinates, chastising them even for a half-minute delay.

Often such people also control the time of lunch and call on a day off, without good reason or serious reasons for this. There is also a chance that he will look for flaws in work that is done perfectly. And instead of a well-deserved bonus, the employee will receive a reprimand.

How to raise a boss

You should not cringe before a nitpick and a hysterical production manager. It is worth clarifying exactly which nuances do not suit the manager, calling him to a dialogue, where he should not only explain what he sees the shortcomings in, but also suggest ways to solve the problem that has arisen.

As for calls on weekends, you can simply not pick up the phone. This is a rest time, and the authorities have no right to accuse you of not being in touch. It is also worth taking the work schedule more seriously, avoiding being late or delaying lunch time. This will lead to the fact that the boss will simply get tired of looking for reasons to blame you, and he will switch to another employee.

Conclusion

Taming bosses is not easy, but it's not really a way out. If the boss is a tyrant, what to do with it is known. You just need to improve the relationship between you. Do not grovel or bend under annoying guidance. On the contrary, for such people, those employees who show dignity and can prove their worth are important. If you fence yourself off from constant nit-picking, you can work calmly.

But globally re-educating this person is a task for his relatives. When building relationships, it is very important to make it clear to the person that you are not only ready, but also want to cooperate with him. It is your desire to resolve the conflict that will allow you to continue labor activity no problem. By recognizing the psychotype of the boss and solving this situation, you can make your life better and get rid of resentment and problems at work.

As the results of this survey show (and confirm the data of previous ones), there is a clear relationship between enthusiasm - that is, motivation and desire to achieve goals - and relationships with management. While 77% of employees who said they were eager to work spoke positively about their interactions with supervisors, only 23% of the “unmotivated” and 4% of the “completely uninterested” could say the same. Gallup found that around the world, only 13% of employees can be considered "enthusiasts". This is alarming, because they are the key to the success of the company.

Bad bosses control every step of their subordinates, harass them, fail to listen, evade disputes and sensitive issues, take credit for others and shift the blame to others, withhold information, set a bad example, do nothing and do not develop personnel - these are the most common complaints. Such behavior will ruin anyone's mood. However, one of your main tasks is to build a relationship with the boss.

Relationship building strategies are available to everyone. For the most part, they seem to be well known, based on common sense. But people often forget that they are able to resolve the conflict themselves, so it will not be superfluous to consider all options.

Put yourself in the shoes of a leader

Bad bosses are usually good people with their weaknesses, but they have to lead others, and this makes them vulnerable. Therefore, it is necessary to pay attention not only to their behavior, but also to the reasons for their actions.

Research confirms that empathy can fundamentally change the relationship between a leader and a subordinate. Stephen Covey and Daniel Goleman believe that this element of emotional intelligence is important in dealing with interpersonal problems. The effectiveness of such a strategy is also recognized by neuroscience: mirror neurons in the brain encourage people to reciprocate. So if you show understanding, your boss will probably do the same and both of you will benefit.

It's not easy to be sympathetic to a boss you don't like. However, Goleman has long shown that empathy can be learned. Research by other scientists, such as the Menninger Clinic, says that if you empathize consciously, you can delve deeper into other people's emotions.

I remember the case of George, the sales manager American company, who tried his best - but in vain - to please his boss named Abby. Abby's indifference plunged him into despair, George knew: Abby is a real beast who sets unattainable goals. As soon as George thought about it, he realized that Abby was ignoring him unintentionally - she is forced to work on several projects at once and she simply does not have enough time to support him.

Analyze your own behavior

Part of the problem lies in the people themselves who are trying to get along with the boss. By their behavior, they prevent the leader from assessing them on their merits. You may not like to hear this, but by admitting that you may be wrong, realizing exactly what, and correcting your actions, you will be able to save your union.

Start with a simple introspection. Try as impartially as possible to consider the chief's criticisms. What do you need to improve? What features of your behavior and results of work could irritate him?

Also, ask yourself what might be causing the conflict. Often, after a short conversation with clients, I find out that managers serve as “transfer objects” for them, embodying personalities. former bosses with whom people could not find a common language. Transference of this kind has a marked effect on behavior.

One of my interlocutors, for example, said that the boss reminds her of her first teacher, who bullied her and was always unhappy with her. Women were similar in appearance and behaved equally categorically.

Usually, when we detect such a transference, people can take action and correct the situation. After our sessions, the client said that she was able to look back, forget old grievances and be more tolerant of the remarks of the boss.

Next, observe your colleagues and consult with those who get along with the boss. Try to delve into the preferences of the leader and the characteristics of his character, look for sensitive points and think about how to change your behavior. But when communicating with colleagues, carefully select the wording. Do not ask why the boss always interrupts you, it is better to ask: “How do you know whether to tell you or be silent? How do you know when to intervene and when not? How do you express your disagreement?

To get the help of your comrades, go to a group training. Another episode from practice: during a seminar on the development of leadership skills, Tom, like all members of that small group, was asked what was bothering him. Tom admitted that he needed to win the favor of the boss, because no matter what he did, everything was wrong. Colleagues answered him honestly. They said that at meetings he chaotically outlines the tasks of his unit and has little confidence in his subordinates. From the point of view of colleagues, the chief is dissatisfied with the activities of Tom for precisely these reasons.

Procedure

Put yourself in the place of the leader - what are the reasons for his actions?
Analyze your own behavior.
Talk to the boss and give him a chance to make a difference.
If other colleagues feel uncomfortable, notify your superiors and Human Resources.
If all else fails, you need to wait and then start looking for another job.

Tom was asked to devote more time to preparing for presentations, to formulate goals more clearly and to define criteria for successfully completed work. He was advised to include subordinates in the speeches and let them write their own reports. Tom asked a few follow-up questions and left the workshop dreaming of putting the recommendations he had received into practice. At a planning meeting for next year, the boss praised his group's presentation and then wrote email, in which he noted that his team began to work more harmoniously.

If, after talking with colleagues, you still do not understand what is wrong with your behavior, contact your manager. Again, be tactful and ask "positive" questions. Not “what am I doing wrong?” but “what can I do to achieve my goal?”. Hint that you need advice and even guidance. Ask for a one-on-one meeting and explain that you would like to talk about your job and developing managerial skills.

If you're lucky, your boss will appreciate your initiative and point out mistakes - and thus lay the foundation for a closer relationship. But if he avoids talking or refuses you in a harsh manner, then it's not about you, and you will have to look for other ways to change - if there are any.

Let the boss make a difference

Only when you finally understand that normal relations are collapsing not only through your fault, you need to openly declare that it is difficult for you to work together, but I would like to find a solution to the problem.

There are many ways to start a conversation about this topic. If necessary, you can continue the previously started frank conversation. Once I worked with a top manager from France, Jeanne, and she told me how, together with her boss, British Richard, she went to meet with a customer. The client tormented both of them terribly, and after that they began to remember together when the negotiations went the wrong way. This gave Jeanne a reason to express some dissatisfaction with the behavior of the boss, and they managed to agree on how to improve relations.

If such a chance does not fall, you will have to call the boss for a conversation. Typically, conflict resolution experts recommend doing this in an informal setting where the boss cannot interrupt you and it would be uncomfortable for both of you to get up and leave. For a conversation to be constructive, people need to feel “safe.” For example, you can invite your boss to a restaurant where you hardly meet colleagues. Say that you would like to discuss some personal matters with him outside the office. If a disagreement between you has caused a delay in the completion of work, offer to talk about the impact of the delay on other projects. Let the boss know that the conversation will be serious and cannot be avoided. If you just say that you would like to talk about your personal relationship with him, he may have more important things to do.

It is likely that when you start a dialogue, you will find that the boss is unaware of how annoyed you are. For example, Jeanne was upset that Richard never asked her opinion, but listened only to her colleagues - mostly English, and men. When it came up, Richard explained that he didn't want to embarrass her in meetings, but he didn't mean to shut her up.

Raise a riot

If you can’t achieve results by adjusting your own behavior or finding ways to interact with your boss, and if your colleagues are also experiencing discomfort, you should report this to higher authorities and the HR department.

But once you're on this path, you need to stock up on strong evidence that your boss is responsible for the situation that has arisen - that it is because of his manner of leadership and behavior that the team, unit, and entire organization will ultimately suffer. Be prepared to threaten the company with legal action. You will need documentary evidence that your boss has chosen the wrong tactics and negatively affects the workflow: testimonies of witnesses, correspondence indicating violations of corporate rules and instructions. The more people who are willing to go on record and make similar claims like yours, the harder it will be for senior management to ignore or deny the problem.

Without undeniable facts indicating that the boss has chosen the wrong course of action, it is unlikely that it will be possible to attract representatives of the personnel department as allies - most likely, they will take the side of the head. Maria, a top manager who could not get in touch with her boss, initially sought help from the HR department. But her boss, who was great at self-promotion, managed to convince HR specialists that Maria herself was to blame for everything. Not only did the director of the personnel department not want to delve into the essence of the conflict, he said that Maria should adapt to her boss.

Such stories are not uncommon - too often subordinates, without good arguments, cannot force the boss to change their behavior and management style and simply lose their jobs. In addition, rebellion and complaints in the future can work against you, so formal complaints are a last resort.

Wait or leave

If none of the above helps you to establish contact with the leader and there are no prerequisites for collective action, there is almost no way out.

Most often in such cases, people continue to work anyhow and try to run into the boss less often. There is always hope that he will leave on his own. However, keep in mind that, having taken a wait-and-see attitude, you need to set a deadline for yourself, otherwise waiting will turn into a way of life - and you will feel superfluous, disappointed in work, and even embittered. This can affect other areas of life, lead to depression.

The smartest thing to do would be to find another job. Edit your resume, get references, and start going to interviews. You are not to blame for the fact that you have a bad boss, but if you stay with him, it will be your fault.

This is exactly what Stacey came up with. She quickly found an interesting vacancy, and at the new place she had an excellent relationship with her boss. A few months later, it was revealed that Peter had left shortly after her. According to official version, it was his decision, but, according to insider information, he was forced to do this from above: he lost too many valuable personnel.