I don't want to do anything at all. How to get rid of the state when you do not want to do anything

Good day, dear readers. In this article we will consider the situation when you do not want to do anything. You will find out for what reasons apathy can attack. Find out how to learn how to motivate yourself, what you need to do for this.

Possible reasons

Many of us have come across a situation where “everything is too lazy”, you don’t want to do anything, there is only one desire - to lie down on the sofa and lie down. But some people allow themselves a momentary weakness, while others make it their lifestyle. At the same time they.

I bring to your attention the most common answers to the question why you don’t want to do anything, the most common causes.

1. Serious health problems, the presence of chronic ailments. It is extremely difficult for a person whose pressure jumps, is very high or vice versa low, the body temperature rises or falls, it is extremely difficult to concentrate on any business. Naturally, he does not have the strength to perform any tasks. Therefore, it is extremely important to monitor the state of your health, diagnose diseases in time, and treat them. If there are chronic ailments, then be under the control of a specialist, receive the necessary medicines in a timely manner.
2. Emotional or physical - the result of prolonged overexertion. When a person overloads himself, the body does not have enough time to fully recover, accumulation occurs, as a result of which the person does not want to do anything. You can get rid of exhaustion through a good rest and a change in the type of activity. Often, the presence of meditation helps in this.
3. Lack of motivation. A person falls into when he does not see a goal in his life. The older we get, the harder it is to engage in self-motivation.
4. The monotony of everyday days, the lack of bright events in life, any changes. In such a situation, it is extremely important for a person to expand his circle of contacts, meet other people more often and spend time with them, not refuse invitations to various events, go to the theater, to a concert, to the cinema. We have the power to change our lives.
5. Problems at work or in personal life. It is especially difficult when they come at the same time. For example, a situation where a man loses his job, and in addition to this, his wife leaves home. Here, not only will the desire to do something disappear, a person can go into depression and even begin to think about. In such cases, it is important to pull yourself together, analyze the last years of your life, reassess your priorities, and realize where you need to move on.
6. Often the cause of apathy lies in low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence. Perhaps you don't want to do anything because you're afraid of failure and people's ridicule and criticism. If you don't act, nothing will change in your life. Sometimes it's worth taking a risk, trying to achieve something. Surely, there is something in which you can succeed, and this should be emphasized.
7. Improper nutrition or lack of proper sleep lead to a complete breakdown. In such a situation, it is extremely important to analyze your daily routine, to make sure that you have a balanced diet, full of all the necessary biologically active substances.

On me, as well as on any person, from time to time finds a reluctance to do anything. Basically, this happens when I am in a state of nervous overexertion. My husband's support helps me fight apathy. He finds the right words, motivates me to take action, and I get back on track.

How to deal with reluctance to do something

Perhaps you are visited by thoughts that “everything is tired”, “I don’t want anything”, there is no understanding of why to continue living. In fact, it's time to understand yourself and understand that it is unacceptable to think in this way, that you definitely need to change something in your life, starting with yourself. Let's look at what actions you can resort to in order to stir up, start acting, pull yourself together.

1. Go in for sports. This will improve your appearance, and also strengthen the condition of your respiratory and cardiovascular systems. In addition, during physical activity, hormones are released into the bloodstream, which increase mood, improve well-being. Regular physical activity allows you to clear your thoughts, adds energy to make new achievements.
2. Try to change the environment. Ideal if you have the opportunity to travel outside the city or even the country. You can also simply go to the country. The main thing is that you change the visible environment. You can make repairs, buy new furniture or just move it, stick wallpaper. That is, you need to change something in what surrounds you daily.
3. Take up reading books. It can be both special literature on motivation, and just fiction books. After all, it often leads us to think about how to live on, in books you can find inspiration. Reading cognitive literature, you can expand your worldview, look at the situation from a different angle.
4. Perhaps you do not have the mood and desire to do something due to the fact that you are forced to do something unpleasant for yourself. For example, you work at an unloved job, every day you force yourself to go to it. In contrast, you can find a hobby that will bring only pleasure. It is also worth considering the fact that many people manage to acquire Additional income, which over time can turn into the main income.
5. Learn to think positively. If you don’t want to do anything because you expect failure, you are sure that any of your actions will lead to inevitable collapse, ridicule, then you need to replace the fear of expected failure with thoughts about possible success, hope for a good outcome of any business. Try to see something good in everything, do not give up ahead of time.
6. If the desire to act is lost due to an unloved job, do not be afraid to change everything. Sometimes it will not be superfluous not only to leave one place of work for another, but also to change the type of activity, to devote oneself new profession. You can take this step at any age.
7. Pay special attention to your diet. Remember that a balanced diet affects the availability of energy, which is so necessary for normal life and reaching new heights. After all, an elementary lack of certain vitamins depletes us, makes us weak.
8. Set the right priorities. Surely, there are many things in your life that simply take your time, energy, but do not bring any results. You need to get rid of them.
9. Don't be afraid to make mistakes. Remember that successful people allow them too. Only they do not get upset, do not engage in self-flagellation, but draw conclusions, learn from their failures, and move on with even greater perseverance.
10. Understand that any person should be engaged in development, not to stop there. This is how our life works.
11. Normalize your sleep. Do not forget that an adult should sleep eight hours a night and it is desirable that this period falls between eleven o'clock at night and seven o'clock in the morning.
12. Start normalizing your self-esteem. Perhaps you think negatively and think that you are not worthy of anything in life. It's not like that, everyone deserves to be recognized, surrounded

• wishes- the desire to possess something;
• Motivations- Willingness to do something to get what you want.

This condition may be short-term, or it may last for long months which is quite dangerous.

Causes of apathy and what to do if you don’t want anything

Before challenging apathy, you should find out the cause of its occurrence, and then apply measures. Frequent culprits for lack of desire and motivation are the following reasons:

	Reasons for apathy
1	General lack of energy
2
3	Laziness
4	Rejection by society
5
6
7
8	Doing something you don't like
9	Distress
10	Causes of a physical nature
11	Asthenia, neurasthenia
12
13
14
15	Depression

1. General lack of energy

Everyday routine, problems of relatives, running around at work, endless streams of information and news are exhausting, taking away all the energy without a trace.

What do we do when we feel tired? We take a mug of warm tea and wrap ourselves in a cozy blanket? No. We are going to work again, take care of the children, the household. We think about anyone or anything, but not about ourselves. It is not surprising that there is no strength left at all.

How to deal with it?

• After work, do not turn on the TV, do not surf the Internet, do not read anything. Stop the flow of any information. Such a rest will only take away strength. It is better to walk around the city, take a bath, do something pleasant. The main thing is that you are left alone with your thoughts at least for 30 minutes.
• Think about your past desires. Even children's. Perhaps you wanted to buy something, eat ice cream, go somewhere, but you still haven't done it. In psychology, there is such a direction as "gestalt therapy". Gestalt is something unfinished that takes energy. Finish your past affairs, fulfill your childhood dreams, and you will release the energy that prevents you from living.
• Learn to forgive. If you hold a grudge against someone, you get upset when you think about someone. Stop doing it, you don't need this negativity at all. Let him go. Forgive both that person and yourself. Think about how it will be easier for you if you let go of this problem.
• Hobbies are really cool! Better psychologists. During what we love, we get distracted and get positive emotions, and some even note that solutions to some current issues come to them for what they love. Remember your childhood hobbies: knitting, embroidery. Maybe you liked to make beaded bracelets? Or you liked to glue something - create a family album by hand, make paper garlands for the holiday or a decorative element. Do what you love. You will feel how you began to think about your desires, and not about the desires imposed by others.
• Remember that everything is cyclical. Let's draw an analogy with the change of seasons in a year. Spring is the beginning of something new, beautiful, in summer we are full of strength and energy, in autumn we reap the fruits of our labors, in winter emptiness sets in. So do we. The old is gone and the new has not yet appeared. Winter for nature is a time of rest. In times like these, we force ourselves to work even harder. The onset of this period suggests that you need to gain strength for the next breakthrough, and not squander what little is left. Take a break and take care of yourself. And remember about cyclicity - everything passes, and this will pass.

Everyone must have watched the old American film Groundhog Day, where the main character has to relive the same day over and over again. This happens in life too. Every day the same work, the same tasks, calls. Sooner or later it will get boring. Any, even the easiest work, puts pressure on the shoulders of a heavy burden. You can't squeeze out a single idea or line. How then to increase productivity?

What to do?

• Jogging. Even if you're not into running, just give it a try. Run around the house at least once. You will see, you will come running home energized and full of new ideas.
• Change of work environment. If you work from home, transfer your workplace to another room or kitchen. If in the office, then try to find a place in the next office, for example. Create an unusual environment for yourself and inspiration will not be long in coming.
• Changing working tools . Turn off your computer and pick up a notebook or notepad. Make the plans and diagrams you need to work on paper. The letter will help launch the thought process and bring you out of the stupor.
• Try to start from the end . When working on a project, change the order of tasks. Choose the tasks that are most attractive for you and proceed to their implementation. So gradually you will do everything that is required.
• Change your daily routine . For example, do in the evening what you usually do in the morning and vice versa. Add some variety to your daily plan. For example, if after work you clean the house, then try to at least vacuum in the morning.
• Relax . If nothing helps at all, agree with yourself that after a couple of hours of rest and pleasant things, you will devote yourself to work. This is how you motivate yourself by “idleness” and will gladly take on any work after a two- or three-hour pause.

Yana. story-woman editor . Due to the nature of my work, I constantly read a lot of information on the Internet in search of inspiration and new trends in the women's industry. But sometimes, passing by Rospechat, I still buy a magazine to read it in the evening, smell the freshly printed paper and take a break from the monitor.

1. Laziness

Banal laziness is one of the simplest and most harmless reasons for not wanting to do anything. But is she really that harmless?

Let's say that in order to become healthy and slim, you decide to run in the morning. In the evening you are full of enthusiasm to start right in the morning. But when you wake up the next morning, you find that running in the morning doesn't feel so good anymore. Healthy sleep is the key to health, you think. You wake up the time allotted for a run, and in the evening you already regret that you could not get up and blame your laziness for everything. The next morning, history repeats itself... Days, weeks, years pass. So laziness has become a serious obstacle to health and harmony. And now extra pounds on the sides, a sore back and other "charms".

And so in everything. Laziness does not allow you to complete tasks, achieve goals, live a full life.

How to deal with laziness?

• Dream. This is part of human nature. Close your eyes and let your thoughts fly freely. Pleasant pictures, thoughts and desires will begin to appear in your head ... You still want something, you always wanted to. There is no point in resisting it.
• Listen to good music. Favorite music can be a great motivator.
• Write wish lists. The main thing is to do it right. When you are alone, take a pencil and a blank sheet of paper and write down all the desires that you can think of. You need to get at least 100. According to psychologists, the first 50 desires are not yours, but imposed by society. After about 50 desires, consciousness will begin to reveal the truth to you.
• Use visualization. Think about what you want. Stick a wish board in a visible place and place on it images of everything that you dream about. So you will see in which direction you need to move.
• Learn to break big things into small ones. It's the same with big dreams. As soon as some goal seems unattainable, think about what you can do to get what you want, think over all the small steps on the way to your dream. You will not even notice how you have achieved what seemed impossible to you a week, a month or a year ago.
• Leave your comfort zone. Do what you were afraid to do before. Let changes into your life and it will sparkle with new colors.
• Track your progress. Every day or every month write down all your successes and achievements and reread this list from time to time. This will inspire you to further exploits.
• Think back to your past successes. You graduated with honors from school or college, got a good job. This will help to cope with despondency and disbelief in one's own strength. You succeeded once and surely you can again!
• Sometimes it's good to do nothing. At all. Turn off the TV, computer, phone, tablet, sit on a chair and fold your arms. Let's see how long you can last. Absolute inaction will force you to do even the most unloved work.

How to overcome laziness: soft, hard and super hard way

1. Rejection by society

Do you feel lonely and useless? Colleagues refuse to deal with you and ignore you in every possible way? Whispering behind your back? Nobody appreciates your efforts? Hands down willy-nilly, motivation is lost and self-esteem drops.

According to research, people who are rejected by society, over time, cease to adapt to social norms, to monitor their appearance. The process of self-destruction starts. There is a craving for alcohol, smoking, eating behavior is disturbed, for example, an outcast begins to abuse sweets. You lose control of yourself and your life.

What to do?

Talk to people around you, ask about the reasons for such a negative attitude. If you can’t establish contact in a team or in a society in which you have to stay for a long time, then it’s better to completely change the environment.

1. Neglect of physical needs

Often waking up for work because you go to bed late. You starve for half a day, and in the evening you try to finish what you didn’t eat all day because of the lack of time for a normal lunch break. Often snack on the run. You don't have breakfast. You work so hard and so hard that you completely forgot about the rest. Familiar situations? Neglecting your physical needs can be a serious cause of a bad mood. After all, fasting provokes a lack of sugar in the body, which makes you irritable and tired. Lack of sleep and rest negatively affects the nervous system. With such a schedule, sooner or later you will simply “break”.

What to do?

As cliche as it sounds, take care of yourself. Be more attentive to your body. Eat regularly, walk in the fresh air, relax and your mood will improve in an instant.

You have to take a serious step in life, but you are not sure of any of the possible solutions. Or vice versa, you just need to go to the store, but you don’t know what exactly you need to buy. The more decision-making situations that happen to you, the more energy you lose. You begin to feel tired, but not physical, but psychological.

What to do?

Keep a notebook where you make a schedule for making decisions. So you will know approximately when and what you need to decide and no longer get out. Because then, . Over time, you will get used to it and it will not seem so hard to you. Don't forget to include rest hours in your schedule.

Let's say you decide to lose weight. Become active in sports and eat right. The weight began to slowly go away, but you are still far from ideal. You were inspired to see the results and began to practice even more intensively. At some point, weight loss slows down and stops completely. It seems to you that all the forces that you expend, the restrictions that you endure are for nothing. Instead of waiting out this period, calmly continue training and dieting, you get frustrated and quit. You are tired of everything and the best way out for you is to buy fatty and junk food and start eating, eating and eating while sitting in front of the TV. And so in everything: in work, in sports, in self-development.

What to do?

It is necessary to realize that everything does not always go straight into the hands. To get what you want, you need to spend a lot of energy and not a little time. See the higher meaning in this. Perhaps what you didn’t get you just don’t need, or the obstacles to getting what you want will give you the experience you need. What you got with difficulty will be valued much higher.

1. Doing something you don't like

You hate your job, but every day you get out of bed to do something you hate. Why? Because you need money, you have a family, or perhaps, at some point, you were promised a good promotion.

Sooner or later you will burn out. You will be overtaken by a state of fatigue, overwork, inner emptiness. You will begin to blame everyone around you for your unhappiness. And you still ask: “why don’t you want to do anything?”. Yes, because you are doing the wrong thing!

What to do?

Listen to yourself, what would you really like to do. It seems to you that life or society requires the right things from you, and you obey people and circumstances, drowning out the cries of your own “I”. Stop doing it, find your true self. Try new things so you don't regret missed opportunities later.

1. Distress

Stress can sometimes be beneficial. In stressful situations, the body mobilizes its entire reserve to combat the unpleasant factors that caused stress. Improves performance, attention and memory. But if the stressful situation drags on too long, our body begins to get tired of such tension. There is complete indifference to what was important. There comes a state when you don’t want anything, nothing makes you happy. Such prolonged stress is called distress. You begin to imagine your future and see little good in it.

Why is this happening?

This is due to the development of the frontal cortex of the brain, which is responsible for our imagination.

• The brain is able to fill in the gaps. If we misheard something, or missed a word in the text, our brain fills in the gaps to get the full picture. Sometimes we don’t even realize that something was missing somewhere. So it is with our thoughts about the future. The brain fills in the gaps about you current state.
• We perceive our future relative to the present. If the current situation causes only negative thoughts, then it becomes more difficult to see a “rosy” future.
• We cannot always predict our feelings about upcoming events. It seems to us that we will be happy when we get married, our team will win, we will win the competition. But in fact, when this happens, a surge positive emotions not as stormy as we expected. But if we are suffering now, it is difficult to imagine happiness in the future.

What to do?

• If any events in your life make you think about how you will feel in the future, it is worth talking with someone who has already experienced such a situation. For example, you have lost a prestigious job and it does not give you peace of mind. Talk to a person who has already been fired from a good position, find out how his life turned out.
• Stop trying to control the future. We can imagine, but we cannot predict.
• Do not limit your gaze into the future subjective sensations. There are always circumstances that can dramatically change your life. Do not look under your feet, look around so as not to miss anything.
• Don't dig into the past. You will not be able to remember past feelings, to determine what you liked and what you didn’t. The brain erases all memories of feelings. You will look at the past from the point of view of your state in the present.
• Don't imagine how it will feel in the future. If you are not able to remember the experienced sensations, then there is no point in trying to predict the future.
• Live here and now. If something serious has happened, do not engage in a deep analysis of the situation. React and act immediately. This is 100% more effective in helping to cope with difficulties.

1. Physical reasons.

Often the state of apathy can be associated with any physical illness, disruptions in work internal organs taking certain medications.

Physical reasons:

1. Job disruption endocrine system;
2. Oncological diseases;
3. Diseases of the cardiovascular system;
4. Alcoholism and drug addiction;
5. Transferred serious illnesses;
6. Lack of vitamins;
7. Taking hormonal drugs ("Dexamethasone", "Prednisolone") and oral contraceptives;
8. Taking drugs that help lower blood pressure (Enalapril).

What to do?

First of all, you should contact medical institution for a complete examination. If it turns out that apathy is caused precisely by malfunctions in the body, it is necessary to undergo treatment.

1. Asthenia, neurasthenia.

The consequence of a serious illness (flu or pneumonia) can be asthenic syndrome. All the forces of the organisms were spent on fighting the disease. Doing the usual things requires more effort and time, and any nervous shock, even pleasant, can provoke hysteria and tears. The cause of asthenia can also be a chronic disease that leads to a breakdown: AIDS, hypotension, diabetes. A person experiences complete indifference to everything, impotence.

There is also a variety of asthenia - neurasthenia a consequence of psychological trauma. The body saves strength, recovering from the experienced shock. It is rather not apathy, but irritation, frequent mood swings.

The development of neurasthenia goes through three phases:

1. Equalizing. A person equally violently reacts to everyday trifles and to a larger problem.
2. Paradoxical. A person is unable to respond to serious problems, but breaks down over trifles.
3. Ultra paradoxical . Absolute fatigue and indifference. A person does not understand what is happening around, it is difficult for him to answer and react.

How to fight?

1. Take drugs and vitamins that help improve brain activity;
2. Start using special psychological tricks. For example, in the paradoxical phase, the Watchman exercise will help:

We lay down on the sofa, close our eyes and try to sweep away any thoughts except one. Imagine that we have a beefy guy in the form of a security guard sitting in our head, on his head is a cap with the inscription "Security". He has no sense of humor, he says only one phrase: "Goodbye!"

1. Syndrome chronic fatigue(CFS)

Apathy can be a consequence of CFS. What is SHU? Here the opinions of scientists are ambiguous. Some believe that this is the same as asthenia and neurasthenia. Others refer to CFS as immune dysfunction or encephalomyelitis.

Unlike asthenia, the syndrome affects groups of people. It is unknown why this is happening. Common versions: undetected virus, intestinal disorders, immune problems, hidden food allergies.

Symptoms of CFS:

1. Insomnia;
2. muscle weakness;
3. Body aches;
4. Exhaustion.

Scientists agree that this is the result of fatigue. From the patient, you can achieve positive emotions, a sincere smile in relation to friends and relatives.

What to do?

Contact a specialist for a complete examination.

1. Schizophrenia and organic lesions in the brain

The cause of apathy can be dementia, neuroinfections, Pick's disease, Alzheimer's, which leads to degradation, accompanied by the loss of any desires, except for the satisfaction of physical needs.

Apathy can also be a symptom of schizophrenia. It all starts with the emergence of crazy ideas, loss of interest in everything. It is difficult for the patient to "kill time", he ceases to take care of himself and the house, which gradually turns into a garbage dump. Then hallucinations appear, a crazy idea attracts his attention to itself and returns the patient's energy for a while.

What to do?

As soon as possible, contact a psychiatrist who will prescribe specialized treatment.

1. Syndrome emotional burnout(CMEA)

SEV - psychological exhaustion caused by prolonged stress. The risk group for this disease includes mainly citizens working with people. Some of the most devoted professionals are suffering: doctors, teachers, social workers… These people, every day, face a wave of negativity, while putting their “soul” into their work. They do not recognize the right to fatigue and rest, trying to help not only formally. Over time, the energy "leaks", psychosomatic diseases develop. The psyche tries to defend itself, “turns off” emotions, human activity becomes formal, specialists become irritated and indifferent towards their clients.

Symptoms:

1. persistent fatigue;
2. Constant feeling of sadness;
3. Ennui;
4. Lack of self-confidence;
5. Inability to express any emotions;
6. Lack of desire.

The CMEA develops as follows:

1 stage . The sharp onset of fatigue, frequent mood swings, loss of interest in previously beloved work. A person tries to work through force, ignoring the alarming signals of his body, stops sleeping peacefully. The feeling of anxiety increases.

2 stage . The person stops communicating with people. Expresses a negative attitude towards others, becomes caustic and irritable.

3 stage . A person loses all contact with society, withdraws into himself, ceases to take care of himself. Develop bad habits: drug addiction, alcoholism, smoking.

How to deal with CMEA?

But it is best to prevent the development of such a state. If you feel that normal sleep has ceased to save you from fatigue, take the following measures:

• Rest more, do not miss vacations and weekends, leave the workplace on time;
• Don't fill your head with unnecessary information. Turn off the TV and read a good book;
• Do what brings you pleasure;
• More physical activity;
• Do not use gadgets too often and for a long time;
• Look for new experiences;
• Learn to prioritize. Don't chase everything at once. Important things first, the rest can wait;
• Think first of all about your health. Sleep at least 7 hours. Eat sweets and caffeine in moderation;
• Express emotions. Man is imperfect. Be human;
• Don't promise too much or it will poison your life;
• Think about what you dream about and what will help to fulfill your dream;
• Do not neglect sedatives. They will help prevent the development of CMEA.
• Try to avoid situations that upset you.

1. Depression

Depression is one of the most dangerous causes of apathy. Depression is a psychological disorder accompanied by a loss of interest in life, a violation of eating behavior, sleep, and emotional retardation. Bad mood does not go away within two weeks. Sometimes there are thoughts of suicide.

According to experts, a person who is depressed will not necessarily look depressed. Sometimes people deliberately have fun, behave excessively in order to hide their condition. But everything they do does not bring them any joy.

Causes of depression can be:

• predisposition to such a condition;
• Death of someone close
• Great exhaustion;
• Mental disorders;
• Prolonged stress;
• Changes in life (retirement, divorce, job loss).

How to beat depression?

In the first six months, depression can be dealt with on your own. To do this, you must adhere to the following rules:

1. Try to be distracted. Do not be alone, do something pleasant, find a hobby. After all, loneliness and idleness are ideal conditions for gloomy thoughts;
2. Move more, and even better go in for sports. Physical activity is health, harmony and endorphins. Three components of a great mood. But choose calm activities such as yoga or Pilates, as exercising too intensely can worsen the condition;
3. Don't set the bar too high. Demanding from ourselves the fulfillment of high goals, endless tasks, we do not allow ourselves to relax, we ourselves create stressful situations;
4. Watch your nutrition. Do not skip meals, eat healthy and wholesome foods. This will strengthen not only your body, but also the nervous system;
5. Try to understand the reason. Think about what triggered your condition. Rethink the situation, perhaps this will help you cope with negative thoughts.

If you can't deal with depression on your own:

1. Contact a specialist who will prescribe antidepressants and prescribe psychotherapy;
2. Strictly follow all instructions of the doctor;
3. Be attentive to your condition, inform the doctor of any changes;
4. Make a plan for the next day, take every hour of your time;
5. Set yourself achievable goals;
6. Keep records;
7. Leave the bed immediately after waking up;
8. Discuss with your doctor how to deal with a possible relapse.

Unfortunately, our children can also be prone to apathy. Since they spend most of their time at school and at home, the cause of apathy should be looked for there.

The most likely causes of apathy in children

1. Lack of parental attention;
2. Wrong approach to the child on the part of teachers;
3. Problems in communication with peers.

How to deal with child apathy?

More attention from parents is needed. Joint trips, games, classes will benefit. With the baby, you should talk more often, have conversations. In the case of peers, organizing activities and games will help the child find mutual language with other children, more often to communicate after school hours.

And finally, a few tips from the famous coach Leonid Krol on what to do when you don’t feel like doing anything:

• You need any desires, especially forbidden ones;
• A tired person will not be able to take care of others, because he does not know what these "others" really need. Ask your loved ones what they want. When your care becomes precise, it becomes much easier;
• If you decide to save the whole world, start with yourself;
• Express emotions, even anger;
• Delineate your territory, everyone should have it;
• Every day, do your exercises, where there should be exercises for the development of plasticity and somersaults. Keep your back straight and your shoulders back;
• Remember your debts, but do not forget about the time for yourself;
• Make new acquaintances, do not hesitate to communicate;
• How tired are you? Start doing beyond the planned work and you will understand what it is, fatigue.

Down with gloom! Apathy and laziness

Often a lot of people are faced with indifference to any business. This is the norm until apathy sets in for everything. This condition is considered pathological and requires treatment by a psychologist. In these cases, it is necessary to find out: why apathy arose, what to do if you don’t want anything, how to deal with the problem? Only a specialist can answer these questions. After all, apathy refers to psychological syndromes. If left untreated, complications may develop. The most common of these is depression. And it refers to serious diseases requiring inpatient treatment.

What is apathy syndrome?

What if you don't want anything? In recent years, these questions have been asked not only by patients, but also by doctors. This problem is very common all over the world. The state of apathy can occur at any age. However, the syndrome is increasingly common among young people, children and adolescents. Apathy is expressed in the lack of interest in activities, events and everything around. Previously, it was believed that a similar condition is observed after provoked by serious problems. Currently, this syndrome occurs at first glance for no apparent reason. Nevertheless, it is necessary to fight apathy. Otherwise, it will lead to depression.

Warning signs are:

1. Emotional disturbance. It is expressed in an inadequate reaction or its absence to any events.
2. Decreased appetite.
3. Slowing down of thought processes, memory lapses.
4. Inhibition of physical reactions. Patients begin to perform more slowly.

The disease "apathy" - what to do if you don't want anything: reasons

Even though there are no obvious causes of apathy, this syndrome occurs for a reason. There are always factors that contribute to this. So before complaining about loved one apathy, laziness arose, you don’t want to do anything, you need to talk to him. In most cases, the cause of this condition lies in the unspoken experiences that constantly disturb the patient. Among psychological factors can be distinguished:

1. Problems at work. Often apathy occurs if a person is not interested in his activity, and he is engaged in it only because of necessity.
2. Love experiences. Often the cause of apathy is unrequited feelings or concern for loved ones.
3. A serious illness, because of which a person suffers not only physically, but also psychologically.
4. This category includes teenagers and the elderly.
5. Loss of a loved one.
6. Inability to realize your plans.
7. Changes in life: change of sphere of activity, team, place of residence.
8. Premenstrual syndrome.

It happens that all these reasons are absent, but the problem still exists. In these cases, patients are interested in: why is there apathy and do not want to do anything? If such a problem arose, it is necessary to find out what else can lead to it.

Relationship of apathy syndrome with physical condition

In some cases, the patient is really not bothered by psychological problems. Then you need to find out: what is his lifestyle, are there also apathy often develops in people taking certain medications. Among the causes of this syndrome, the following conditions are distinguished:

1. Chronic diseases of the cardiovascular system. Due to the fact that a person is constantly tormented by discomfort in the chest or high blood pressure, apathy often occurs. After all, almost everyone knows about the complications of these pathologies (heart attack, stroke). In addition to worries about one's health, apathy syndrome manifests itself as a result of lifestyle changes (quitting smoking, mental stress, playing sports).
2. Transferred serious illnesses. In this case, the loss of interest in life is explained by the constant fear of a “new blow”.
3. Oncological pathologies. A state of apathy occurs in almost every person who has encountered cancer. Indeed, according to the majority, oncological diseases lead to inevitable death. To dispel this stereotype, the coordinated work of doctors of several specialties is required.
4. Diseases of the endocrine system. Often apathy is caused by hormonal dysfunction that occurs with pathologies of the adrenal glands, diabetes mellitus, pituitary adenoma.
5. Chronic alcoholism and drug addiction.
6. Taking hormonal drugs. Among them are glucocorticosteroids (drugs "Prednisolone", "Dexamethasone"), oral contraceptives.
7. The use of antihypertensive drugs. These include drugs "Enalapril", "Clonidine", etc.
8. Avitaminosis.

Social aspects of the emergence of apathy

Psychologists around the world are trying to unravel: where does apathy come from, what to do if you don’t want anything? After all this problem today has grown to enormous proportions. Because of the syndrome of apathy, not only the patient suffers, but the whole society. Indifference to work, study and social progress leads to the loss of qualified personnel, improper education of the future generation, etc. In severe cases given state can even lead to suicide. Therefore, you need to know how to behave in relation to someone who has apathy, what to do if someone close to you does not want anything. The public interest in such cases is great importance. Often apathy occurs when a person believes that no one understands him. Also, the appearance of this syndrome is associated with the non-recognition of the patient as a valuable worker or a superficial attitude from others.

Why does apathy occur in childhood?

Unfortunately, apathy syndrome has become widespread in children. In this case, parents should definitely consult with a psychologist, ask a question about what can cause apathy, what to do if the child does not want anything? As you know, most of the time children spend at home or at school. Therefore, the cause of the problem must be looked for there. Indifference to the environment can be caused by upbringing. In most cases, apathy affects those children who rarely spend time with their parents. Also, indifference can be caused by the wrong approach to the child on the part of teachers. In both cases, it is necessary to have conversations with the baby as often as possible, perform some tasks together, interest him in games, etc. Another reason for apathy in childhood is the child’s inability to find a common language with peers. At the same time, you should try to organize joint events more often. This will help children to communicate with each other after school hours and find common interests.

Methods of dealing with the state of apathy

Before deciding what to do in case of indifference to everything, it is necessary to find out exactly: why apathy arose, what to do if you don’t want anything. The solution to the problem depends not only on the work of a specialist. To get rid of this condition, you also need the desire of the patient himself. Treatment depends on the cause of the apathy. In case of influence of psychological factors, it is required to seek medical help. Sometimes you can get rid of apathy on your own, but for this you need to recognize the problem and make an effort to solve it. Such methods include: changing the scope of activities, rest, talking with loved ones. If the problem is caused by physical factors, then it is worth fixing them.

Syndrome "apathy" - what to do if you don't want anything: treatment

A psychologist is in charge of apathy. The initial sessions are devoted to finding out the cause of indifference. If apathy arose as a result of stressful situations, not only psychological, but also medical treatment is necessary. Most often this applies to cases where the patient has lost someone close to him, his job. Prescribe drugs that calm the nervous system, antidepressants. Among them are medicines: Magnesium B6, Prozac, Persen. It is worth remembering that these drugs are not indicated in all cases. The main method of treatment is psychotherapy. In case of drug apathy, a replacement is recommended medicines provoking indifference. With hormonal dysfunction, consultation with an endocrinologist is necessary.

How to behave if apathy has appeared, what to do if you don’t want anything? The advice of a psychologist will help you regain interest in life. These include the following instructions:

1. Find the cause of dissatisfaction with life.
2. Relax in an unusual environment (go to the sea, spend a weekend with friends).
3. Change the field of activity, if the cause of apathy lies in the work.
4. Set aside time to do what you love.
5. Change your habitual lifestyle.

Prevention of apathy syndrome in children and adults

To avoid apathy, you need to be in agreement with yourself. You need to be in nature as much as possible, alternate work and rest, get enough sleep. It is also important to improve nutrition: eat vegetables and fruits, take vitamins. If apathy is observed in a child, it is worth spending more time with him, more often interested in his thoughts, organizing a joint vacation for yourself and your children.

This is what happened to me many years before the depression, what I managed to get used to, accept and even forget - what it is like to live with desires.

Years ago, when I was in the pain of losing my desires, as you are now, I wrote a single article on this blog ("I don't want anything") that got over 200 comments. A significant part of the comments were from those people who were already depressed and for whom this symptom was one of the worst. And he is really terrible - I didn’t understand then how much, I didn’t understand that it was with him that my journey to depression began and that it was only a matter of time before she declared herself in all her icy beauty.

The first bell rang, but I didn't hear it then. Just as people get used to living without a hand, so, apparently, they get used to living without desires - some phantom pains sometimes appeared, but, in general, I really got used to it. Time, in this case, really heals, the pain passes, as any pain of loss passes or dulls. I'm just used to the fact that I'm like this now, I stopped remembering myself differently.

Instead of lost desires, I grew myself something like a mental crutch (to hobble through life further) and named it Marcus Aurelius, for its commitment to stoicism. (“Sat down, swam, arrived, get out”)

I didn’t want anything, but I thought that “do what you must, and come what may” is not the worst choice in the market for prostheses of psychological personality traits. I've seen people get worse. Perhaps this is what allowed me to last almost ten years as a “normal” person before depression covered me with its blanket.

But this article is not about depression. If you want to know more about it, subscribe to blog updates and read other articles. This post is for those who, like me (ten years ago), realized that they don't want anything else, are horrified, and want to understand - Why? What is wrong with me? Why don't I want anything? And more importantly, is there anything I can do about it?

Now I am both sad and funny that I preferred to get used to living without desires, the opportunity to deal with the causes of this phenomenon. Terribly sorry for the lost time, and very sorry for those people who, like me, dangle through life, wanting nothing, achieving nothing and doing nothing. Awww! You are not alone! Sit comfortably - perhaps I will tell you your own story.

WHERE OUR DESIRES COME FROM

But, first, it would be necessary to say where, in fact, our desires come from. What “I want”, “I can” and “I need” they grow out of.

A harmonious person is constantly changing - developing (in a broad sense), growing, learning something new. His environment changes, the course of his thoughts, his possibilities. Life sets new challenges for him and opens up new horizons. And at each stage of his life, a person seeks to harmonize himself in new conditions - he has changed, the world has changed, opportunities have changed - there is a desire to do something, to reach some optimal point for this moment. Maybe to achieve recognition at work, maybe to become independent, build a house or buy a car.

Our conscious desire is a choice whose task is to bring us closer to some optimal position in life for us. It can be said that desire (and its fulfillment) is a way to harmonize oneself. Find a new balance, find a new optimal position. And it (choice) is formed not only from our exclusively internal needs, it is directly and indirectly, to a greater or lesser extent, influenced by many other factors - how much it is approved by society, how our relatives, our friends will react to it, what model of choice our age and socio-cultural layer adheres to.

We can give a physical analogy: our desire is a total vector of force, and its direction and absolute value is made up of our subconscious "I want", passed through the sieve of the conscious "must", "I have the right" and "I can" and received a high assessment of social approval. The analogy does not pretend to be absolute accuracy, I gave it in order to show that even a mentally harmonious person may have difficulties with his desires. With my "want".

You and I once had them, desires, but even when they were, we were not always able to bring them to life.

Maybe the total vector was too small - you wanted one thing, but your family expected something completely different from you. Maybe your social circle dictated to you to earn money, and a genuine, inner desire was associated with penniless creativity? The result, in both cases, was clearly not optimal. You either broke through to your goal, to your “I want”, with a fight, earning a feeling of guilt in parallel (I did something that upset people significant to me), or retreated, abandoned your “I want” and fled - remaining with a dry residue in the form of low self-esteem, psychological discomfort, frustration, the same feeling of guilt and, in some cases, neurosis.

This not very successful experience, repeated many times, is perhaps the basis of your current state. The result of your desires, your efforts, your deeds did not lead to a positively assessed result, and therefore were not fixed in your psychological program. Moreover, in total they were assessed negatively - your EGO now sees in your desires a threat to itself, to its harmony and integrity - it does not want to experience guilt, inferiority and low self-esteem.

Outcome: I DON'T WANT ANYTHING! Why want if it doesn't lead to anything good? If the result was and will only be pain and disappointment? Isn't it better to go with the flow and do what you have to?

I can say no. In my case, this did not lead to anything good, although I think I was demonstrating "good" behavior.

AND WHERE OUR “WANTS” DISAPPEAR…

“Well, okay, you say. What about my desires? Where do they end up disappearing to?

They are repressed into the unconscious. Your "want", as a threat, is isolated. It causes fear, anxiety, guilt and threatens your self-esteem. Therefore, your consciousness uses one of the psychological defense mechanisms to isolate it.

As Wikipedia says: (click to expand)

“Defense mechanism (psychological defense) is an unconscious mental process aimed at minimizing negative experiences”

“The functional purpose and purpose of psychological defense is to weaken the intrapersonal conflict (tension, anxiety) caused by the contradiction between the instinctive impulses of the unconscious and the learned demands external environment resulting from social interaction. By weakening this conflict, protection regulates human behavior, increasing its adaptability and balancing the psyche.

(Ffu-uh. I love definitions from Wikipedia. It feels like someone just smoothed out the last convolutions with a hot iron ... I, like Winnie the Pooh, only upset complex words. And Wikipedia is clearly written by Rabbit, for other Rabbits ...)

I'll try to put it more simply. What do WE need to know about these mechanisms?

MECHANISMS OF PSYCHOLOGICAL PROTECTION

We all, to a greater or lesser extent, use them unconsciously. And in themselves - they are neither good nor bad, their role is to protect us from unnecessary worries, negative emotions, stress and even depression. (i.e. also harmonize yourself with the world and with yourself)

True, this happens by distorting reality, and in “severe” cases, by completely denying it. We unconsciously rotate it so that we feel psychologically comfortable.

That is, on the way to harmony, we can go along the route: I want-> I wish-> I make a choice-> I act. And we can twist reality in such a way that we do not want and do not want. From the point of view of the ease of achieving comfort and harmony, the final choice may be the choice of the second path. There are definitely fewer negative experiences on it, and the short-term result, in comparison with the movement along the path of desires, is more predictable.

Problems arise if we use psychological defense mechanisms too often. We cannot reach our goals. (even though they are getting smaller) Most of these mechanisms are generated by our reaction to society and psychologists directly associate the excessive use of these mechanisms with the path of the loser. Our desire to “fit in”, to be (consider ourselves) a good parent, husband, wife, son, daughter, friend, citizen, etc.

“But he is a good man,” they say about the groom, who looks like a clear nonentity. (Sergey Dovlatov)

That is, to subordinate our desires to the requirements of others. And in order not to feel defective at this moment (due to the fact that the desires of the society and ours do not coincide), we use psychological defense mechanisms.

For example:

CROWDING OUT

REPLACEMENT - the involuntary movement of unacceptable impulses into the unconscious.

In order to avoid intrapersonal conflict, it is necessary to control the "forbidden" desires and impulses. "Forbidden" in quotation marks, because their prohibition does not mean the presence of any pathology in them. They are "forbidden" by virtue of their inconsistency with the role in society that you have voluntarily accepted.

Following these desires can cause you, for example, a feeling of guilt and, according to the logic of this protective mechanism, in order, on the one hand, not to feel guilty, and on the other hand, not to experience frustration and discomfort from the fact that your desires are not fulfilled - you, unconsciously, SUPPRESS your desires.

NEGATION

DENIAL can allow a person to preventively, proactively, isolate themselves from traumatic events. So, for example, the fear of failure operates - a person strives not to be in a situation in which he can fail. Avoid competition, refuse activities in which you are not strong (especially compared to others) - all this classic examples denials.

That is, if you have a traumatic experience of not achieving your goals and thus not fulfilling your desires, then the mechanism of denial can preemptively cut you out of life's competition, simply removing your desire to participate in it.

RATIONALIZATION

The inaccessibility of our objects of desire (real or imaginary) can be perceived by us as our failure, failure. Then, in order to maintain self-respect, we reduce the value of our aspirations. We say to ourselves: “Yes, well ... I didn’t really want to!”

In Krylov's fable "The Fox and the Grapes", the Fox renounces his desire to taste the grapes:

... She went and said with annoyance: “Well! Looks like he's good.

(And rationalizes his refusal:)

Yes, green - there are no ripe berries: You will immediately set your teeth on edge

Rationalization is common to many people. And the question, rather, is an adequate assessment of the achievability of our goals and how quickly we give up. A quick rejection of what we want and a feeling that we do not want anything - are they really that different?

FANTASY (DREAM)

Fantasizing, we, in our dreams, experience the achievement of some goal, which in real life may seem unattainable to us. We compensate for our insufficiency, incompetence and other "Not-". We "as it were", (perhaps - repeatedly) experience the realization of our "I want" and draw in our imagination: "Done!". This allows us to no longer return to this "I want" - is it already in the past? Well, well, here I have it marked: “Achieved” ...

The full list of possible psychological defense mechanisms is quite large. And many of these tools can be used to substitute, sublimate, hide and devalue our true desires.

Whether such behavior will be characteristic of a particular person depends on the personality traits, on the experience experienced and the characteristics of the social environment. The latter - because a person develops and begins to use all these psychological mechanisms solely as a reaction to the pressure of society, to bring his "I" to the optimal position, taking into account (albeit unconsciously) perceived social norms. And how exactly YOU perceived them, how rigid these frames are for you - whether they form a dotted line, a fence or a concrete impenetrable wall for you - all this will form your space for choosing desires.

Separately, it is worth mentioning the syndrome of learned helplessness.

LEARNED HELPLESS

is not, in itself, a psychological defense mechanism. Rather, it can use a whole bunch of defense mechanisms (such as those listed above, plus regression, intellectualization, etc.)

Briefly, the essence of learned (or acquired) helplessness is that a person stops trying to do something if previous attempts ended in failure. The obvious part of this state can be described as follows: Suppose a young man asks a girl out on a date, but gets rejected. After some time, he invites another - again a refusal follows. He no longer invites the third (or fourth, fifth). Stops trying.

And the less obvious part is that his motivation to do things in the parallel areas of his life also goes down. The perception of oneself as a loser, based on defeat in one area, can be translated into all areas of life.

It is especially dangerous to acquire such a syndrome in childhood. The child is defenseless, his self-esteem is almost entirely in the hands of his parents. And if his parents constantly criticize him: “you are incompetent”, “you can’t achieve anything”, “but whoever does this, leave, it’s better that I do everything myself”, then this message becomes a person’s attitude for life. He ceases even to want to achieve something or change anything in his life. For what? All the same, a) nothing will work out b) he does not deserve it.

The adult world is also cruel. An authoritarian leadership style, for example, kills initiative—i.e. the desire to do something yourself and get a positive psychological response. An imbalance in family relationships can also make one of the spouses a weak-willed, wanting nothing, rag.

But, let's not write off all the sins on others. A series of life failures can also lead a person to such a state - you do it, you beat like a fish on ice and ... - nothing. The result is zero. Naturally, hands down...

COMFORT ZONE

Uh! But I'm a normal person! How does all this apply to me!?

Consciousness filters those desires that seem impossible to us. And our need for harmony can ALREADY be satisfied. (And something else does not seem available to us - we are still limited in resources). In such cases, mathematicians speak of a local maximum, which, translated into understandable language, means that we cannot leave this point - any of our desires in this state is a threat to our ideal position.

Fortunately, life changes - we learn something new, new opportunities appear, new problems arise. And life throws us off this pedestal - we are no longer the king of the hill and there is an incentive to climb somewhere else ...

The problem is that sometimes it changes too slowly. Because we strive with all our might to maintain this order of things: we do not leave work - we are appreciated there (although we have ceased to develop), we do not stop relations that have become empty (it is so familiar and comfortable in them). Every day we choose the familiar in everything - we feel SO good, what else do we want?

And doubly difficult, because we do not see the future.

This applies to those who have already achieved their "local maximum" and to those who feel themselves at the bottom of a deep well. (Actually, one can also settle down quite well at the bottom and take the highest available position there.) What is common in both cases is that we equally do not see any real steps that could harmonize us at a new “optimal” level.

In his early diaries, Leo Tolstoy set himself the following goals:

1) Get into the circle of players and, with money, play. 2) Get into high society and, under certain conditions, get married. 3) Find a place that is profitable for the service.

But, a little more than 20 years pass and Tolstoy writes in "Confession" that he is healthy, and physically and mentally efficient, he has all the material benefits, that he literally feels at the TOP, but ... no longer sees the meaning in his life. From his summit, he, Tolstoy, does not see the point of further existence! What to say about the rest!? Let our peaks be smaller, but our outlook is already ...

Perhaps this condition can be called normal. A normal, well-maintained ... trap, for quite, when viewed from the outside, successful and happy person. You do not need to have any pathologies and mental disorders to get into it. In this "Comfort Zone", where all your desires are either satisfied or planned for many years to come. And if you are a workaholic, and even with a minimum of interests outside of work, then you are not just at risk, you are already in this “Zone” ...

Before I describe the way out of this state, let's look at children as an example. They are full of desires. It is impossible to imagine that a healthy child would say: "I WANT NOTHING". And every year, even every month, these desires are different. Because children are constantly changing, they are in a permanent state of growth and development. Elderly people, in contrast to children, quite easily seem to us to be deprived of pronounced desires. This happens not only because they objectively have less energy, but in many respects because they have stopped developing. It is even banal to learn something new, to study.

If on this scale "child" - "old man" you feel closer to the old people, and mentally appeal to me: "Well, damn it, what about health? And where to get the strength! ”, Then I could cite, as an example, several of my acquaintances pensioners who, even weighed down by various diseases of age, will give odds in terms of energy to the young. (It's not about the energy, it's about the fact that action precedes motivation. Get started and strength will appear.)

WHY I WANT (AND WHAT YOU SHOULD DO)

The only way out of the Comfort Zone that I see is to try something new. Rock the boat. Learn, develop, communicate with new people. From my own experience - to change, in general - to change something in your “settled” life, is very scary. But - along with the physical, concentrated somewhere in the stomach, a feeling of fear from the planned changes, I received such a surge of desires, such a want-want-want that I was forced to start a separate page for them in my Bullet Journal.

Yes - I'm afraid. (But fear, now, for me is a marker. A good and reliable marker - it shows that I am moving, changing and developing.)

I'm not perfect. But I know that personality traits, experience and a list of approved social attitudes - all this can be understood and changed:

Like me, you probably have low self-esteem. It can be lifted. Do not forget to praise yourself - what you do and what you achieve and have achieved in your life is your merit. Depression taught me that goal achievement is a science. That I can do anything without even having any motivation.

Perhaps you, like me, have a traumatic experience of not fulfilling your desires. Failure to achieve your goals. Uncertainty, which further lowers self-esteem. Learned helplessness, etc. This chapter of life is worth reading, comprehending and starting a new one.

I admit that the level of your social obligations puts your desires at the bottom of the priority list (somewhere between a paper knife and a champagne bucket, as one of my acquaintances said). Learn to say "NO". And remember that in order to take care of the world, you must first learn to take care of yourself.

And don't let yourself feel guilty - you're good enough. You are sufficient. Guilt is like a leash, but it is not part of the dog, but the owner's tool. It is not part of your personality.

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What if you don't want anything? - This question comes to me constantly from different people. First, a person does not have to constantly want something. Sometimes, when all basic needs are satisfied, we are in a state of "plateau" - we just live and enjoy what we already have. But usually people who ask this question do not belong to this category. As a rule, they have just not enough energy to realize their own main goal in life and even fleeting material desires.

The fact is that sometimes our debts and responsibilities, daily routine, information and news, the affairs of relatives and friends, and so on absorb all our energy, all our attention and strength, that we are simply exhausted, and there is not only time for ourselves, but even desire ...

And sometimes it even seems that this is normal, that this is an adult life, that everything is as it should be.

But it's not! And it’s good that you are asking yourself this question: why and how to change the situation?!

In the cycle of life, when day after day you go through business, you definitely need to find a loophole, you definitely need to set aside some time for yourself, gradually restoring energy, charging it, so that at one fine moment you WANT again! To want anything, the desire comes by itself, especially if you find time to relax, retire, and listen to your body, heart, soul.

How can you manage to step back from everyday exhaustion, especially if you don’t seem to want anything?
I can give you some tips that I myself used and that helped my friends.

1. It is highly desirable to completely exclude the receipt of any various unnecessary information, especially news of world catastrophes and so on. when you come home in the evening, after dinner, you just want to relax and watch TV or surf the Internet. It is simply unbelievable how much energy such a “rest” takes (DOES NOT GIVE!) Pay attention to how you spend your time after work, before bed. It is best to set aside at least 30-60 minutes and retire. Maybe take a walk around the city if you have the strength, maybe take a bath, you don’t need to listen to the radio or music or read books at this time, you just need to be alone with your thoughts, drive away negative ones, think about something pleasant, maybe just dream about something completely incredible.

2. Remember what you liked to do before, maybe as a child. Maybe swim or paint? Maybe just knit or read in the park? Do something with beads? Or dance? Surely there was something you loved that you have not done for a long time. Try to set aside time on the weekend and do this, maybe even you won’t really want it, you just need to start doing it. At this moment, thoughts and sensations will themselves take you to another level, to a level that is consonant with your personal desires, and not with the desires of the world around you.

3. Maybe you have long dreamed of sewing something for yourself or just buying or making or going somewhere? In general, try to remember your old desires. There is a “Gestalt therapy” direction in psychology, in short, Gestalt is something unfinished, something unclosed, some kind of mental anguish that constantly takes energy away until you complete it, this is a conversation with someone or some other action. So, when we complete our plans and fulfill our desires, allow ourselves to buy, say, do something, we release energy and no longer give it to this unfinished. The technique of wizards is about the same - remember a long-standing unfulfilled desire, maybe even a child's, and fulfill it! For example, go and eat ice cream in a cafe where they liked to eat it as a child or in a similar one, in general, the essence, I hope, is clear.

4. If you hold a grudge against someone or get angry, perhaps without even admitting it to yourself, in general, if mentally imagining a person, you experience bitterness, resentment or anger, and other negative feelings, ask yourself: why? and most importantly - WHY? Why do you have these feelings? Maybe it's easier this way, maybe it's nice to feel sorry for yourself or something else. Wizards do not go into psychoanalysis, just when you directly ask yourself the question WHY, it becomes clear that in principle there is NO WHY - this is just a waste of strength and emotions. Therefore, you need to learn forgive and FORGIVE- and others, and yourself - for whatever it was. You don't owe anything to anyone, just as nobody owes you anything. If thoughts about someone still annoy you, try using the technique.

In total, all these tips are aimed at restoring the overall energy potential. You can find other ways to recharge - meditation, creativity, you can recharge by reading books about positive thinking, you can work with water, etc. The main thing is to return YOUR WISHES to yourself, but it’s impossible to do this on purpose, they will come when you tune in, from your own Self, and not from outside.

There is another possible reason. This is the only once strong desire that was not fulfilled, and which still does not give rest, completely sucking out all the forces. In life, this manifests itself in the form of depression after, for example, unrequited love or another tragedy. In this case, it is even more important to take care of yourself, listen to pleasant music, sing mantras, read positive or spiritual literature.